Thursday, May 7, 2015

God is bigger than the NUMBER

Recently we learned we were #776 on the wait list (we were #927 on July 3). 
There is an estimate that we have another two years to wait for our Colombian bundle- but my soul argues that God is bigger than wait list numbers. 

The last few weeks have been especially heavy on my heart  for some reason. 

Being in a hurry for an international adoption is cause for concern (as children available too quickly should raise red flags & I don't want to take a child out of their environment/country/etc unless they truly need it) but I think my soul is growing weary. I started praying for this almost 5 years ago. And it has been a roller coaster - just as we had been warned might happen :) 

It is hard to know just how much a heart can take, and yet I know that no matter the wait, with Jesus in my heart I will be able to do it. I have faith in his timing, as so far looking back, he has blessed us far more through this journey already, than we could imagine (and we haven't even gotten to the best part yet!).

And yet, as I said before, I think that God is bigger than our "estimates" and "wait lists".
That there is a child that is meant to fill the hole in our family.
I don't want to ask for prayers for the wait to move quickly (because that means that that there are too many children who are in orphanages waiting for families), but for that hole to be filled much sooner because just the right child needs us (as we need them).
(It probably doesn't help that a few days ago Elle started asking about a "little brudder". Bless her heart!)

This prayer of Jesus, while his circumstances were far worse, gives me courage to still pray boldly for this wait to be over...
"My father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will."